December 5, 2021

STFU South Carolina.

Senator Robert Ford of Charleston, South Carolina (go chiefs!) – it’s my opinion that you’re a fucking idiot.

Why do I think he’s a fucking idiot? Because if I had posted that sentence on a blog hosted in South Carolina, I’d be guilty of a felony and facing up to 5 years in pound me in the ass prison. That is, if his latest bill on profanity actually passes. In addition, I have to say that it’s my opinion so that this isn’t portrayed as slander.

Up here in the northern states though, we’re familiar with the constitution (seriously Mr. Ford, you should read it. Can somebody send him a copy with the relevant parts highlighted?) and we know that it protects free speech. That means I’m allowed to say words like Fuck, Shit, Damn, Ass, and well here’s a list of all the rest.

Granted using these words makes my writing sound less professional and more juvenile, so I often don’t. Since I can’t use them in a business setting either, they very rarely find their way into my vocabulary. In fact, save for hockey games, poker night, and deer camp, it’s pretty safe to say that I really don’t swear. It’s just nice to know that I can say FUCK if I want to. fuck fuck fuckity boo boo kitty fuck.

Seriously? A 5 year, $5000 felony? You’ve got to be fucking kidding me! Do the people who voted for you know what kind of crazy bills you’re proposing? How would you even enforce that on the internet? Sounds to me like it would drive the web hosting and technology companies right the fuck (see, how I used a swear word there to enhance the meaning of my thought?) out of South Carolina.

I’m all about protecting the children too, but trying to shelter our children and hide them away from bad things isn’t the way to do it. You don’t need a law to protect your child from profanity, you need a 10 minute discussion at the kitchen table. Odds are your kid will be able to teach you some words you haven’t even heard of.

About Ryan Jones

Ryan Jones is an SEO from Detroit. By day he works as a manager of SEO & Analytics at SapientNitro where his team performs SEO for Fortune500 clients. By night he's either playing hockey or attempting to take over the world with his own websites - which he would have already succeeded in doing had it not been for those meddling kids and their dog. The views expressed here have not been paid for and belong only to Ryan, not any of his employers or clients. Follow Ryan on Twitter at: @RyanJones, add him on Google+ or visit his personal website: www.RyanMJones.com

Comments

  1. Well, shit. That’s a pretty stupid bill.

  2. Amen Brother…AMEN